I am not a superwoman

 I’m not your superwoman
I’m not the kind of girl who you can let down
And think that everything’s okay
Boy, I am only human
This girl needs more than occasional
Hugs as a token of love from you to me, ooh, baby

About 20 years ago, long before I got married I used to sing this song of Karyn White with my friends. back then I don’t really know the meaning, but after 10 years of married I think I can relate to it.

I am not trying to complaint about my husband, because he could  say to me “I am not a superman” as well. Is just right now we (still) don’t have a maid, so I feel like I am the one who doing all the chores in the house. Back from work I have to pick up the laundry from the laundry hanger in front of our house (thanks God for a sunny day), all are dry and smell good. Fold it nicely, if i got the time is enough I can iron them in the evening, follow by doing dishes from breakfast (didn’t have time to do it this morning). Meanwhile I have to make sure that my kids have their nap, if not I scolded them by saying if they don’t obey me they can take my place and do the house work. I will soak some more clothes in the buckets with detergent (I wonder why there are always clothes to wash?) Sometimes I sat for a little while in front of  TV and watch, but can’t be too long cause there are another chore wait for me. Next I will cook for dinner. Dinner here including rice, veggies and meat or fish (that’s healthy food in my opinion). After my kids are wake up I will take shower and make sure they do the same thing. Then when my husband come home, we can have nice dinner together.

My husband chores in the house is only (only) to sweep and mop the floor, and clean the bathroom once a while. But when he fail to do it I got irritated. He prefer to take the time to entertain the kids, in other words play with them. I don’t mind that but I can’t stand the floor dirty, should I do it too when I have 2 buckets of laundry waiting for me? And I mean by washing is doing it with my own hand and brush, we don’t have the machine. Last time he feel guilty seeing me so tired,  he did the ironing after I fall of sleep. I really appreciate what he did but I told him, I can do mine. He just have to make sure his, and give me lots of love.

Wake up in the morning is a constant burden for me, cause I hardly feel fresh. I need some “counterpain” (muscle’s remedial) on my hips and back after taking shower to make me feel better, and it’s hard to apply it by myself, and when my husband didn’t bother to help me,  I feel like he didn’t care. I started to make a list of what have I done:  cooked breakfast, prepared  lunch box for all of us, and help the kids to get ready and what did he does? just make sure himself ready. Don’t get me wrong this is not happen all the time, sometimes he does helped, but when you got angry you feel like that what’s happen all the time. O! is so much easier when we have a maid, but right now we don’t have that priviledge

Am I too spoil? There are many other women in my country and around the world who have to do this all their lives. Thank God if they have a good husband to bring home some dough for the family, but if not…how much worse their situation from me? I guess I just need to be grateful and learn to be effective. I am not a superwoman, but i can do it if I have to….for my family.


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